My own personal bogeyman is dead!
When I heard the news it was as if a huge weight was lifted off my shoulders, something I've been carrying so long, I forgot it was not part of me. A sickening sense of responsibility, a dark shadow of fear... all lifted so quickly I had to sit down and catch my breath.
20 years, and it is now over. So much pain, and shame and rage. The legacy of a rape and a trial, over and done forever, with Death as the guarantee.
Julia and I walked down to the water and tossed something old and ugly out to sea - a symbol of all that we were releasing. It was a casual ritual. No casting of circles or conjuring of witnesses. Just a discarding.
And then we walked away.
I love you Cara..
ReplyDeleteI hope that the part of you that has lived so long outside of comfort has not withered, only suffered.
ReplyDeleteOn a more positive note, if you keep floating around like that, I've got some weights you can stick in your purse.